To all those wondering why you didn’t get graced with a personal phone call this week letting you know we were leaving the country – don’t worry. We aren’t. 😉
Yesterday marked 5 weeks waiting for our USCIS approval email, and today is (UGH) Friday – which means if we don’t hear anything today, then we get to (oh joy!) wait through the weekend and hope again for Monday!
We’ve been trolling all our FB groups and Haiti adoptive family forums and blogs, (it’s actually quite creepy how obsessively troll-like we are…) and the range of recent USCIS approvals have been anywhere from 5-8 weeks. Ummm…how ’bout today? 5 is good. I’m spent!
I actually figured that last week the passport came through while I was writing this blog post, so maybe if I sat down to write, the email would come through…so far it isn’t working…so I guess I just have to type “yada,yada, yada” and copy and paste for another week. Don’t worry, I’ll spare you the complete boredom.
This week I kept myself busy with distractions – it’s literally all I can do to keep the craziness and insanity at bay. I bought a booster seat for the car – quite an emotional experience, for sure! I don’t think I ever had the concrete thought of “one of these days I’ll actually have a close-at-hand NEED to buy a child booster seat! I’m sure people were wondering why I was standing zoning out at the line of boosters in the aisle for 3 hours. It was like putting it in my cart meant this was actually, for serious going to happen. That he was actually going to fold his little bony brown body into the seat and put his little water bottle in the cup holder and hold a baggie of fishy crackers! FISHY CRACKERS. There are going to be actual crumbs in a booster because he’s going to sit in it, after all these years!
He probably won’t even like them. More than likely, it will be smeared with chocolate pudding or nutella, knowing that boy! 😉
I was taking Ollie for a walk up to the park a few days ago, basking in God’s newest installment of Vitamin D (Praise Jesus for sunshine – we were all getting a bit pasty-vampire-ish) and looking at each yard and fence and house, fluffy neighborhood kitties and miles of green grassy lawns…realizing that in a couple years, this will all be his “normal”. That when he comes home for the first time these surroundings and these crazy people who spray their grass with water, or have a sidewalk through acres of green grass, or who play basketball in their driveways on an actual basketball hoop that belongs to them, who have beautiful flowers and massive trees right outside their windows – this will all be such a crazy, overwhelming experience. The fragrances that he picks up – will be assaulting, because what he is used to is an overwhelming cloud of rotting fruit, garbage, and or ammonia when they mop the floors. He’s used to clouds of dust caking his nostrils on the way to school instead of freshly cut grass and lilac blooms. The wildlife for him will be insane as well! I don’t think I saw a single bird other than pigeons at the orphanage, and our woods behind our house sounds like the Aviary at the zoo – it’s just a wall of chirping and songbirds! Pets on leashes, the Zoo animals behind bars and glass, riding a bike or scooters in the driveway, even walking through a neighborhood – all this will be fantastically new to him. It will be like landing in a new world that he didn’t really know even existed – and one where he doesn’t speak the language.
God sent us a massive blessing in the form of a name and number from a fellow adoptive family in the area – a young woman who works in our community, who is fluent in Haitian Creole! I already contacted her and she is excited to help us with translation or just conversation in Creole whenever we need it for Wesley! God knew what we would need and of all places that he could have placed someone who would know our son’s language – it would be within our community!
While we are beside ourselves with excitement for bringing him home to his forever family, we are aware that bringing him into one world of happiness and joy means a departure and acute loss of everything he has known and loved for the last 7 years. His friends, his nannies, his home at the orphanage, his school – people that love and care for him, and the familiarity of the dust and the humble homes, the frail old men that stand at their doorways and simply watch the children walk to school (I’m not sure if this is a type of neighborhood watch, or just because watching people is more interesting than watching a cinderblock wall…probably the latter). He will lose the comfort of his ease in communication and language, and will grieve the loss of these in a way we cannot possibly understand.
Adoption is a beautiful thing, but it always is a result of some kind of loss. We are praying that over time God will be able to restore Wesley’s heart, that he will come to love and cherish the new loved ones he has here, but that we would be consistent in keeping alive the love and circle of friends and heritage/culture that he had in Haiti as well.
Okay, well, I’m officially out of “yada, yadas” and have to go make a grocery run! Today my task is to keep myself busy making soup and cleaning out the last few things in Wesley’s room so that it’s ready for him!
Distractions, distractions…bring them on!