Sink or Swim

Usually I have pretty good days through this process – in the last 5 months, when we’ve had delays or speed bumps, they are quickly resolved in a matter of just a few days, and it hasn’t given us time to wallow in the frustration.

Today is not one of those good days. A few weeks ago, we announced that our Dossier was flagged to be rush-submitted to the next step in the process – to come out of legalization in the Ministry of Foreign Affairs (MOFA) or shoot, is it Foreign Ministry of Affairs (FMOA) – either way the acronyms look an awful lot like swear words to me and I try not to use them! 🙂

It was scheduled to be delivered a few days after that announcement. A week later, we found out that there had been a simple delay and it would be delivered the next day following (one week after original delivery date). End of day, upon confirming, we found out that there had been a riot outside of the building and that local police had gassed the surrounding crowd, which happened to include the orphanage representative that was delivering our papers to the IBESR. (Haiti’s equivalent of Social Services for the entire country as far as we can tell) He was going to take a day to recover and would go back two days later. Two days later, after checking in, we were told the delivery was not made, and was delayed yet again another day. The following day, same story, but then we were heading into a weekend, and the following Monday was a national holiday for Haiti and the office would be closed, so the next day (last Tuesday) it would be delivered.

Tuesday the appointment was made and end of day the delivery hadn’t happened. After further pressing, the representative was finally told that the appointments for delivery were continually delayed and cancelled because there was a letter from MOFA (?) that was supposed to accompany our Dossier paperwork that hadn’t arrived yet from the lawyer, and that they could not accept the delivery without that letter.

One week later now, we are still waiting for them to get to the bottom of why that letter is not there, and who has it, who can obtain it.

Kris and I are left to the mercy of pestering our poor Haiti Family Coordinator daily via email to see if she has had any updates. Kris is much better at keeping his frustration in check and self-regulating his internal thermometer. My attempts at my own internal calm are absolutely futile. I am frustrated that we have no control over getting this done and am struggling with the hopeless feeling that it will just be left undone and since no one knows the answer to the question, it won’t get pursued and will just get left there to sit in no man’s land.

We are SO CLOSE to having a name and a face – as soon as our paperwork is officially submitted to the IBESR we will have an estimated timeline of 30-120 day countdown until we can have a file in hand with a name, face, family history, health history, details, etc. of our SON. We are SO CLOSE. Yet it feels infinitely far away when I have not a smidgen of control over when that 30-120 days begins.

The letter could be found and delivered today. It could be found and delivered tomorrow. It could be found and delivered 3 months from now. I have no control and its increasingly difficult for me to accept the situation.

We could use prayer right now – prayer for calm, and peace and trust that it is being taken care of in the best way that everyone working on it knows how.

We could also use an amassed army of prayer over that STINKING LETTER!!! Pray that it will be unearthed, and delivered into the hands of the people who are waiting for it – and that our paperwork will be delivered and deemed approved to move forward.

Please keep us in your prayers – any encouragement, prayers for joy in the midst of the waiting – for peace in the midst of uncontrollable situations.

We have a choice now to sink into our frustration and let it envelop us or continue swimming against the tide towards hope and completion. I’m trying to swim, but my arms are getting tired and I can’t breathe!!:)

Thank you!


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